Mid 1970's

Uncle Fernando was nothing like his brother.  For starters, he had LONG HAIR. And he was a MUSICIAN.

He lived in the Pacific Northwest, far from the eyes of his  family and farther from their expectations.  On one visit we arrived very late in the evening, our  parents having driven through the night.  My sister and I slept through the long drive, yet I awoke before her, and listened to them speculate as they often did. I  didn't understand what  "hippie" meant, but the tone from my mother suggested I should be frightened of him,  or rather, their impression of him.

He lived freely, as if a part of a collective where one could dance barefoot to bongos and tamborines.  We arrived to a whirlwind of  tie-dye wafting as Uncle Fernando’s wayward companions hefted amps and speakers and smoked on cigarettes that smelled of over ripened fruit. I hummed in anticipation as the room bristled with life upon plugging in. Tired and exasperated, Dad and Mom cautiously perched with my sister and I on each lap.  They looked uncomfortable and whispered for us not to touch or eat ANYTHING and NO COOKIES. The brothers had not seen each other in years, for Fernando had hit the road when his brother returned from Vietnam.They looked so much alike, and still looked so different.

Fernando embraced the subculture of the 60's, in sharp contrast to the structure and duty his brother held first as a soldier, and now.as a husband and father. Their family and lives had changed since 1968. Upon arriving and greeting his smiling, stoned brother, my dad looked much older than his young age. Fernando dripped of sex, drugs, and rock and roll. He was surrounded by breezy young girls,  patchouli scented and braless. Fernando winked and whistled as his band jammed for hours on end.

My sister and I cheered and screamed between songs, and ended the show alongside the band. With tambourines of our own, our Uncle pulling us from the grips of our parents to dance and get a feel for being center stage. It felt warm and inviting and the cookies tasted just fine.